


Another Word for Desperate

by muchlessvermillion



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Aftercare, Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Anal Sex, Anxiety Disorder, Aphrodisiacs, BDSM, BDSM used as a method for dealing with brain fuckery, Biting, Coming Untouched, Consensual Minor Aphrodisiac Use, Desperation, Dirty Talk, Face-Sitting, Fingering, Fluff and Smut, Foursome, Hair-pulling, Manhandling, Multi, Oral Sex, Polyamorous Relationship Discussions, Polyamory, Praise, Slow and Sloppy, Subspace, Teasing, mentions of recreational drug use, technically ectobiological incest, though in a setting wherein no one is related
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 12:31:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15841356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/muchlessvermillion/pseuds/muchlessvermillion
Summary: Dave has an anxiety disorder. Jade, one of his partners, is a scientific genius with a knowledge of plants, who very kindly has made him a variety of herb-based tea blends for when he wants a break from day-to-day anxiety but it's not bad enough for his actual prescription meds.One of the blends has a mild aphrodisiac in it. For when he wants a break from anxiety and also wants to get his brains fucked out for the night.Tonight is one of those nights, and despite the rigors of polyamorous scheduling, everyone is going to be there to help.





	Another Word for Desperate

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WolfFromMars](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfFromMars/gifts).



> The prompt I was given was:  
> John/Jade/Rose/Dave  
> I just want wholesome porn for these guys  
> Or like "wow I want that so bad and it would be so hot if it happened holy shit"  
> I love these kids and you can't go wrong with them, just don't tear them apart I'd cry
> 
> Somehow this translated to (very wholesome) minor aphrodisiac BDSM porn focused on Dave.
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

There were benefits to having a girlfriend that’s a mad genius plant scientist. And no, pot was not the benefit. Or, at least, Jade didn’t _grow_ pot, even if she did smoke it, so he wasn’t getting any pot from her, other than the usual taking a drag from your girlfriend’s pipe thing.

Pot was not the point. The point was that Dave got… antsy, sometimes. Antsy or any other applicable synonyms. Nervous. Jittery. Anxious. Weird. As fucked up as a guy with three insanely hot partners that also happened to be his best friends could realistically be, which, admittedly, was probably less than he would’ve been without them. He had what the really cool kids (and therapists) called an anxiety disorder. And yeah, sure, he'd been to a doctor, after some major convincing, though he still didn't like that he was the weird one for not liking a stranger sticking needles in him, he'd gotten shit prescribed, he was working on it in all the ways you're supposed to, but... his current meds were as-needed, meant more for staving off actual oncoming panic attacks than day-to-day management. He didn't wanna use those unless he really needed them. And he didn't always like the side-effects when they kicked in. Sometimes he just wanted to, you know, chill. Take a break from being so fully in his own head, when his hands got shaky and he could feel the gut punch of unwarranted nerves crash on him like a surging tide. Panic attacks were like being pulled under, riptide style, gasping for air every time you could break the surface, treading water while your legs tired. Normal low-level daily anxiety was just like being dunked, but the water was freezing, and you weren't wearing your trunks. Or maybe not even getting dunked, but sitting in the sand watching the waves roll towards you, and maybe you know that it's not going to drown you, but you can't stop feeling like it might.

That's where Jade came in. And no, the answer still wasn't pot. Well, not mostly. Sometimes pot was involved.

Jade, with all her botanical knowledge, had a whole repertoire of plants that were good for easing an anxious disposition, along with just about anything else you could imagine. She and Rose were both really into designing weird tea blends, drying whatever they could find in order to brew it. Some came out better than others. There was one that had been more bitter than just about anything Dave had ever tasted, but that was fortunately an outlier. Mostly they tasted like varying flavors of plant water, and then he dumped honey in them.

Jade had two major blends for calming anxiety, cultivated specifically for Dave (though not always only used by him). One for general, easy use, and one for when Dave wanted to take a breather _and_ was cool with getting his brains fucked out.

The second and first blends were pretty similar, with one pretty important difference: the second blend had damiana in it.  

There was all sorts of basic shit that everyone knew about for anxiety, things that often got boiled into tea; lavender, and chamomile, and lemon balm. Damiana wasn’t _that_ different from the rest of them. It was supposed to calm nerves, make you chill out, like a super low-level high.

But the thing about damiana was, when it was originally getting used hundreds of years ago, it wasn't getting made into drinks for easing anxiety. It was being used as an aphrodisiac. Because that was one of the other things it did.  And sure, the scientific community was out on the verdict of whether or not its supposed effects were super substantiated, but they didn't _need_ a peer-reviewed paper on it, because holy hell did it work on Dave.

It didn't do anything crazy, or whatever. It wasn't like it put him out of his mind. It just made him (and whoever else), you know, horny as hell.

Taking a chill pill and a nap was all well and good. But sometimes he just wanted to both chill the fuck out, put off having to worry about anything for a few hours, and get forcibly manhandled away from stress by his partners making inventive use of his hands and mouth and whatever. No biggie.

When Dave was feelin' like he might want to spend the evening that way (which was, obviously, only when at least one other person was feeling good and not busy and not scheduled to work or anything; it wasn't like he woke up some days with an incredible urge to be inconvenient), he'd text the group chat and ask if anyone was up for it. If not, whatever, he just found some other thing to do; downed some of blend number one and took a run, or worked on a track, or smoked a bowl, or hung out with a friend. Or hung out with a friend and did all that other shit, but with the friend.

If his partners _were_ up for it, though, then they figured out a good time for it, and Dave brewed some goddamn sexy tea. Or Jade did, since it was her tea. Whoever, basically. Usually Dave was the only one who drank it, though not always. Jade was the most likely to join him, and John was the least. John didn't really like tea. He wasn't a fan of the taste. He was a coffee dude, especially when it was drowning in milk and sugar and flavored syrups, and Dave liked coffee as much as the next guy (including creamy sugary confection drinks), but he could still appreciate the feeling of a nice hot cup of tea, goddamn John, what do you even do when you don't want caffeine in your system and it's cold out?

Anyway.

Tonight was one of those nights.

He’d asked, and he’d gotten a three-way unanimous yes. Dave had a feeling the others were kinda looking to work some stress out, too. All four of them were just about approaching college graduation, only needing to push through the last round of finals after a shit ton of time spent on getting in thesis papers and presentations and exhibitions (and that had taken a _hell_ of a lot of calming tea), and most of them were working part-time besides. Sometimes that meant nights sprawled on the floor of their four-bedroom apartment and venting, or scheduling in time for stupid movie nights, or making use of the campus gym (Jade and John, mostly), or just crawling under the covers of their own individual beds and scrolling alone on a phone, because some stress was best worked out by taking a break from the world, including the people you loved most-- and sometimes it meant breaking Dave down to his base parts and then building him back up again. Y’know. Occasionally.

It wasn’t something they did all the time (though there was often a general undercurrent of Dave being pushed around a little bit in their sex life, because that was how he liked it), and there were a lot of times when things were vanilla as hell. Most often things were only able to be coordinated to be done in twos or threes anyway, because it could be hard, getting four people all individually up for sex at the same time. But when they _did_ do this, it was always an experience. And somehow, tonight, the stars had aligned so that everyone would be there.

Dave’s general anxiety had almost been overtaken by a different kind of jitters.

 

He was settled on the couch by the time Jade got home, kissed him on the forehead, and went into the kitchen to brew some tea. They had time. There was still dinner to be had, before anything was going to happen. It worked out well; the tea took about an hour to kick in, and Dave wouldn't wanna do this on an empty stomach, anyway. Not long after Jade came Rose, who smirked at him with dark eyes and cuddled up on the couch with her feet in his lap, chattering away like nothing strange was happening. And then John, who came bearing a pre-arranged offering; two big bags filled with containers of take-out Chinese food.

"Fuck yes," Dave said, dumping Rose's feet off his lap and leaping up to help. "Let's get those babies on a table with some silverware."

"I mean, yeah," John laughed, his eyes twinkling. "That was kind of the plan. I don't know about you, but I don't exactly like eating chow fun with my fingers."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Rose responded, as Dave grabbed one of the bags and started laying out styrofoam containers across the oblong dinner table they used for any meals that weren't done standing up at the counter or sitting on the floor in front of the T.V. "Personally, I think using my fingers is the best way to eat anything." She stood too, and nudged her hip against John's as she passed him on her way to the kitchen. "You just tilt your head back and drop the noodles in. Who cares if you get sticky? It's the most direct pipeline to the tongue." Despite what she was saying, she was heading towards the silverware drawer, and pulling out four forks. There would be disposable wooden chopsticks in the bags, but forks were always a good standby, in case someone was feeling uncoordinated or something was especially slippery.

"I have drinks," Jade chimed, interrupting. She kissed at Rose's bare shoulder, her arms full of mugs and glasses that were all pressed against her chest so she could carry them at once. She set them down on the table with care, sliding a tall glass of lemonade towards John's place, and what Dave could only assume was a more traditional tea towards her own and Rose's. Then, carrying just the last mug, she came around the table and, with purpose, placed Dave's mug directly in front of him, leaning over his back to do so. Her breath was hot on his ear, her body a firm line against his back. She was just that little bit taller than him, didn’t have to lean on her tiptoes to get her arms over his shoulders.

She pulled back, and he sat down with a thump, still opening small containers of dumplings and sauces.

The others joined him, doling out napkins and utensils, piling mushrooms and Chinese broccoli and noodles with shrimp onto plates, passing things around in a circle so everyone got their share.

"So!" Jade chirped, one of her feet sliding over Dave's under the table. "How was everyone's day?" Dave took an overlarge sip of his tea, burning his tongue (worth it), and shoved a potsticker into his mouth. The table was silent for a moment as everyone arranged food on their plates, ate their first few bites.

“You know,” Rose answered, finally, prying the tail off a shrimp. “It was.”

“Oh, wow,” John said, with a snigger. “You totally didn’t ask that girl in your class what she thinks of polyamory, did you.”

"Oh noooo, Rose," Jade said, when she didn't respond right away. "We had that whole talk about it, too. I thought you were all psyched up!"

"I don't see why you're so invested," Rose said, focusing intently on her chopsticks. "You've never even _met_ Kanaya."

"And we never _will_ meet Kanaya, if you don't talk to her!" Jade argued. "The semester is almost over, already."

"There's no unobtrusive way to glean her feelings on the matter, anyway," Rose responded. "It's entirely awkward, and if she _doesn't_ react well, maybe I don't want to know the answer. Maybe it's best to just let the semester end and have it drift past as a fondly remembered classroom crush instead of trying to plumb the depths of her thoughts on our relationship style."

"Don't you, like, already have her number?" John asked. "Can it drift fondly, or whatever, if you already have her number?" Dave slurped on his tea. He speared a dumpling onto a single chopstick. Then he leaned in, making an attempt to make diagonal eye contact with Rose, his elbows on the table, his shades sliding down his nose.

"Hey, Rose," he said. "Rose. Rose."

"Yes, Dave?"

"I can't believe you're a fucking coward."

"Jesus Christ," John said, clapping a hand over his mouth to keep in his giggles.

"That's coward's talk, Rose, are you a fucking coward? Lettin' your fear rule you? Can't even casually bring up your partners and see how the cute girl reacts? Can't take a risk and see if it pays off? Can't just stare fear in the face and then open your mouth and, like, vore it whole, and then not mention the vore to the cute girl because it's a bad flirting tactic which I do know from firsthand experience, but, what, you're just gonna let your fake brain feelings tell you what to do? Gonna let the fake brain feelings keep you from kissing the cute girl? I know this is ironic from a dude with a diagnosed anxiety disorder, but listen, Rose, listen. Are you a fucking coward?" To punctuate, Dave pulled the dumpling off his chopstick with his teeth. Rose was staring at him with attempted stoniness, the corner of her mouth twitching. There was a moment of silence. Jade's socked foot had somehow ended up on Dave's knee.

"Okay," Rose said, her eyes rolling but her mouth smiling. "I'll talk to her. And then you will pay for your insolence. Cowardice has never darkened the doorstep of the house of Lalonde."

"I'll look forward to it," Dave responded, earning an 'eeeew, Dave, chew first' from Jade.

The table fell back into enthusiastic eating. John told a story about some dude that had come by the coffee shop he worked at, which went too long and lost the plot halfway through. Jade nearly fell off her chair trying to describe a tree with sufficient passion. By the time plates were clean and everyone was leaning against their seat backs, inevitable leftovers cooling on the table, Jade's foot had climbed up to Dave's thigh and his mug was empty.

John was the first to stand. He stretched his arms over his head, a big showy production, his shoulders popping and biceps straining. Dave always liked John's muscles. He may have been taller, but John was definitely bulkier.

"Sooo," John started, and Dave sat up straight in his chair. "Who wants to watch some Criminal Minds? Like an episode or two?"

" _What_?" It was out of Dave's mouth before he could stop himself.

"Is there a problem, Dave?" Rose asked, looking very pleased with herself. Dave swallowed.

"...No," he said, finally.

"Cool," said John, with a grin. "Then I guess it's time for Criminal Minds."

 

They all piled into the living room, and took up residence on their oversized couch. Dave went to sit in the last remaining space, but was stopped by a set of warm, wide hands on his waist. He was pulled down onto John's lap, sandwiched between Jade on his right side and Rose on his left. Dave shifted, and then settled. Jade turned on the T.V.

Dave couldn't possibly focus on the plot. Every time he thought he might be able to, his heart rate slowing, there was a brush of a hand against his side, on his leg. One of Rose's had taken up residence in his hair, gently stroking through, but with a frustratingly inconsistent rhythm. One of Jade's warm hands was curved around the sliver of skin showing on his stomach between his pants and his shirt, and she was tracing her nails over it. John's hands were still fixed upon the curve of his hips. They felt huge, like that, searingly warm even though the denim of his skinny jeans. Onscreen, there was a lot of talking, probably some murders. Dave could hardly understand any of it. He was too focused on his pulse in his ears, on his mouth drying out.

It was kicking in. Every hand on him loomed so large in the scheme of his focus. At some point, Rose and Jade had traded, and Jade was now petting his hair while Rose tucked her cold fingertips under the hem of his t-shirt. He hadn't noticed while it was happening. John huffed a laugh, and his breath ghosted over Dave's shoulder.

Dave was never really sure, when he got like this, whether he was so focused on what he could feel because of the herbs or the anticipation for what was to come. Technically, all damiana was meant to do was increase stamina and turn you on. There was nothing that said the graze of fingernails over your abdomen would make you clench and shiver all over, that the littlest touch would feel so big while you waited. It might have all been him. It didn't matter. It didn't have to be chemically encouraged to affect him.

John's thumbs were rubbing circles in the jut of Dave's hip bones. In the show there was a gunshot, and Dave couldn't even bring himself to flinch. He pressed his back all up against John's front like a cat, his head tilting back to lean against his shoulder. Jade scratched a little more firmly, her fingers winding through his hair. Dave's breathing was labored, and he wasn’t sure how long ago it had begun. Time was drifting past as a lazy stream, and he was just letting it pass instead of trying to grab at every minute he might otherwise lose, paying attention instead to each point of contact of someone else's skin on his, even those that were unintentional. His legs fell apart, bracketed by John's knees. Rose was idly stroking along the path carved by his waistband, and when he glanced at her, she wasn't even looking at him, her eyes focused on the screen though her mouth was curved into a smirk. John pressed a kiss to the shell of Dave's ear. Jade twisted her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck and tugged, not nearly as hard as she knew he would like. Time drifted further.

The next thing Dave knew, Jade’s fingers were tightening and his mouth fell open on a whine as the rest of him went slack. Out of the corner of his eye he could see credits scrolling across the screen.

Had it been forty five minutes? An hour? It had to have been, or something like it. Jade, her fingers still wound through his hair, pulled herself to her feet and then yanked upwards, and Dave came back to himself with a jerk, his whole body going taut and tingly. He could hear himself moaning.

"Wow, Dave," John said, sounding pleased. "We've barely even done anything, and you're already making noises." The fact that he was saying it like it was some kind of surprising revelation when it decidedly wasn't didn't escape Dave, and neither did the fact that having it pointed out was going straight to his dick. "Up you go," John added, tapping at Dave's thighs. Rose extended a hand to help him to his feet, and then dug the nails of her other hand into his side the moment he was upright, just to watch his legs tremble.

Still fully dressed, Dave was guided into his own bedroom. The whole way, he was granted little touches --a hand on his back, fingers squeezing his wrist, Jade giving his ass a quick pinch and then dissolving into giggles-- but nothing more substantial. He was aware that too little had happened for him to be able to justify being half-hard in his jeans, but he was, all the same. At least he had the excuse of the tea, but even Dave wasn't sure it wouldn't be happening either way.

In his room, the lights stayed on and the curtains were drawn. John planted a hand in the middle of his chest and used it to push Dave back onto his bed, where he landed with a bounce. Then, while he watched, the three of them gathered at the foot, whispering together with their eyes on him. His very own predatory pack. Dave licked at his dry lips, his heart hammering. He felt like he was going to be devoured. He could think of nothing he'd want more.

They broke out of their huddle (like football players, Dave thought, drawing upon one of the very few things he knew about football) and three sets of hungry eyes traced the lines of him.

"Arms up," John said, and his voice was hoarse now. It was gratifying to know Dave wasn't the only one being affected. "And keep them there. We're not going to bind them. It's on you to listen." Dave nodded, eager, his fingers hooking into the headboard. The sheets were cool against his bare arms, his comforter already tucked away in the closet because it had been too hot the night before. He was wearing too many clothes, but he knew he was meant to leave them until told otherwise. John stripped off his own shirt, exposing strong arms and a muscled torso and a stomach with some give. Jade followed, her newly bared chest reminding Dave just how much power her hips could hold. He could look at them all forever and never get tired of it.

When he looked around for Rose, he found her already at his side, still clothed but with a smile on that seemed nakeder than skin could be. She rearranged him, pulling his hands away from the headboard, lifting his head, and settled herself up against the wall. When she let him come back down, it was with his head in her lap and her fingers in his hair. If he lolled his head back he could see her, her eyes dark and blown wide and fixed on his face. He offered her a slightly loopy smile, and she smiled back, tracing over his lips with the pads of her fingers.

He felt hands on his belt, and lifted his hips on instinct. Jade stripped him of his socks, and John pulled his pants over his ankles, leaving him in a t-shirt and his boxers. He could feel the bed dip, but Rose fisted her fingers in the hair close to his scalp, and he couldn't lift his head to see what was happening.

Fingers pinched at his nipples through the thin fabric of his t-shirt, and Dave sucked his lower lip into his mouth and groaned through it. One of the fingers started circling an areola, and the hair raised on the backs of his knees. That had to be Jade, then, and that made John the one grazing nails over his thighs. Dave's eyes had closed at some point, and he didn't realize until he felt Rose's fingers on one eyelid, tapping. His lids fluttered open, and as a reward she loosened her grip on his hair.  

He tilted his head up just in time for Jade to pull his lip from between his teeth with her own, her long dark hair obscuring his view of whatever John might be doing near the foot of the bed. Jade kissed his mouth, lush and indulgent, sucking on his lower lip, teasing with a hint of her tongue. She gave him a wide grin, and then unceremoniously stuck her fingers in his mouth. Two of them, rubbing up against his tongue, pressing it down, letting him slobber over her fingers. He tried to respond properly, to close his lips around them and suck, to flick his tongue between them. It was hard, managing enough control to react instead of just letting her have her way with his slack mouth, and that wasn't even the damiana; it didn't _affect_ his motor skills. He could probably juggle with it in his system, could ride a bike. It was just that there was so much to focus on, everywhere, and he could feel his heartbeat in his head and in his cock, and he wasn't worrying about anything at all right now beyond where he was going to be touched next. Jade rucked his t-shirt up to his neck to expose him to her touches.

Behind Jade, somewhere, John was maneuvering his hips, though Dave wasn't sure to what end. He was dragged a few feet down the bed, and Rose and Jade moved with him, following. Jade fucked her fingers deeper into his mouth. Rose leaned over him and whispered into his ear.

"You're always such a mess," she said, gleeful. He shivered, his eyes fluttering closed again. Jade pressed another finger down against his tongue. John had shucked off Dave's boxers at some point, leaving him bare from the waist down, but was decidedly not touching him. Not where he needed it, anyway. Rose continued, tugging on his hair with a rhythm that left his scalp tingling as Jade made a concentrated effort to leave teeth marks down the vulnerable line of his throat. "When we do this, you take so little to get all fucked up and sloppy." She dug her nails into his collarbone, in tandem to the hickey that Jade was sucking on the exact opposite side, a mirror. "And begging," Rose added. "You beg so easy and so pretty." Dave would've begged now, if she wanted, if they all wanted, but he couldn't, with Jade still feeling up his tongue like she could get anything out of it. She was properly fucking his mouth with her fingers now, shallow, as she worked over his neck and shoulders with kisses and nips and sucking bites that would leave bruises.

Dave liked that. Ending up bruised the next day. Marked up and claimed and reminded that they loved him enough to do this for him. He was aware, in a distant sort of way, that he was drooling down his chin as Jade pressed into him. He didn't mind that, either. His arms were still free, hooked around Rose's waist, and he knew that if he wanted to stop all he had to do was pull them back and tap the closest person on the shoulder, and they'd all back off. He decidedly _didn't_ want to stop, but the easy reach, the knowledge, it just let him drift further along. He was giving up control. He didn't get to or have to decide what happened, who touched him and where, he didn't have to ask, and they didn't have to listen if he did. He could just let himself be moved and used and toyed with, and relax secure in the knowledge that if he held up a hand to stop them everyone would back up all at once and let him catch his breath.

If he stayed long enough in the dark behind his eyelids, he couldn't even tell who was touching him. Not if he let his mind focus just on feeling, not on analyzing. If he tried, he would know, they were distinct; Rose teasing and a little harsh, Jade mouthy, John firm and willing to manhandle him when he asked. But if he just let himself drift... God. It was like he was floating, like there could be any number of hands on him.

Rose dug a fingernail into his nipple (a very Rose move, despite his attempts to just let things happen without examining) and he jerked, moaning around Jade's fingers. He wanted someone to finally touch him. He wanted someone to touch him so badly.

The next thing he knew, two fingers were pressing into him, and his eyes were drifting back open. John was between his spread thighs, down to his boxers now, with fingers scissoring in Dave and an opened bottle of lube to the side. He and Jade were kissing sloppy as he did it, and she was straddling one of Dave's legs. She was still wearing pants, but as he watched, she rubbed her hips down against him, likely pressing her clit hard against his leg through the fabric. He tried to move the leg to help and she made a happy little moan, but then put her hands behind her to hold him down and keep him still.

He looked up at Rose, his mouth now empty enough to speak but still occupied with a near-constant stream of moans, and found her lipstick smeared down her chin, stark even on her dark skin. She and Jade must have been kissing, at some point between when Jade finished marking his neck up and when she made her way to John. She looked beautiful like that, a little bit disheveled, her hair sticking up. He knew he had to be more of a mess, though. He could tell without being able to see that his lips were bitten red, that he would have tiny bruises all across his neck and chest by the next day. His nipples were standing stiff, pink.

John added another finger to the two inside him, and Dave rocked his hips up, moaning again. Jade hopped off his thigh and rolled over, straddling his waist instead and facing away from him for the apparently sole purpose of more easily keeping his hips in place and his thighs spread. She was, fuck, she was holding his legs wide, as if John between them wasn't enough of an encouragement for that to happen on its own. Rose smiled down at him, something vicious, and he felt something in him shift.

"Please," Dave found himself saying. He licked his dry lips, and tried to lift his head to appeal to anyone he could make eye contact with. "Please, fuck, please, please."

"Do you even know what you want?" Rose asked. "Or are you just asking?"

"I don't think it matters what he wants," John replied, his eyes twinkling bright. He spread his fingers inside Dave, and Dave felt his cock twitch and his mouth fall wide. "I think it matters what we want, right now. And what I want is to fuck him stupid. How's that sound, Dave?"

"Please," Dave repeated, his fingers twined in the back of Rose's shirt, looking for just about anything to hold onto. He meant it, even if he wasn't coming up with many more words. "Please," he said again, emphatic, to be sure they knew he wasn't just saying that.

"Alright, then," John said, and there was the slick blunt head of him against Dave’s ass, rubbing along the crack and his inner thighs, feeling impossibly giant wth Dave in this state. He maybe wasn't as prepared as he could've been, but on nights like these that was what he wanted. The press in was slow, and thorough, and Jade held him still while he tried to thrash, and Rose held his head in place when he tried to twist it. There was so much energy building in his body, and it was so _good_ , so much and so good and so all at once, and there was nowhere for it to go, because his stupid wonderful beautiful partners wouldn't let him move, not to get closer and not to get away.

John bottomed out, and Jade raked her fingernails down his thighs, and Rose put fingers into his mouth to give him something to suck on. He was moaning without pause, unable to stop it. Every touch felt so huge, and John's cock inside him was a focus point, and he was sure his thighs were shaking.

John paused, and then shifted, readjusting Dave's legs so they hung up over his arms while he pressed back into him, and the angle made Dave want to cry.

Scratch that-- he _was_ crying, overwhelmed and warm and so loved he couldn't control himself. Rose pulled fingers from his wet, wanting lips to stroke a tear away, looking slightly concerned, but he just nodded at her like a bobblehead, his unoccupied mouth splitting into a grin. It was so much, but it wasn't _too_ much. It was so much, but it was just enough. Rose pressed a tender kiss to his forehead, and then lifted his head so she could get out from underneath him and off to the side, just in time for John to thrust into him hard enough to rock the bed.

Dave shouted, teary-eyed, smiling, his fingers twisting into the sheets now that Rose wasn't there to hold onto.

"More," he asked, something desperate roaring in his chest. "Please, fuck, there's gotta be--" He didn't have to wait long. John tightened the grip on his thighs, and while Rose watched, Jade crawled up his body. She kissed him again, first, murmuring at him about how good he was, how beautiful.

"You're gorgeous like this," she said, and he tilted his face into her hand on his cheek, his heart full. "You're so beautiful for us, so beautiful all the time, and so fucking good, Dave. You're good? This okay?" He could hardly speak for wanting, but managed to give her an affirmative, to show her the empty hands he could still use if he needed. She smiled at him with all her teeth, something that never failed to make his heart clench, and kissed him again. Then, she wiggled her jeans and panties off all at once, and straddled his face.

The last thing Dave saw before he closed his eyes and prepared to make good use of his mouth was Rose smiling like the Cheshire cat, slipping a hand down the front of her skirt to touch herself as she watched.

Jade rocked against him with the same strength she used in everything, the strength she used when she had him bent over the couch to fuck him breathless with her strap-on. All he could do was keep his mouth moving and try to follow her pace, licking against her folds and her clit as she gripped her hands in his hair and rode him like a bucking bronco. She was fucking herself _on_ him, rather than him eating her out.

Dave felt someone take one of his hands, and then soft wet, warm and shifting, and realized Rose was using him too, using his fingers like a toy to grind against and get herself off. With John moving between his thighs, rubbing worshipful hands over his hips and waist and legs, thumbing at his stretched-out hole, decidedly not touching his cock, they were all using him to get off. Just as he had wanted. Time had become a gooey, stretchy thing; while before it had been passing without his notice, now it was like it wasn't passing at all, and like there was nothing wrong with that. He didn't have to think about it. He didn't have to think about tomorrow, or today, or the day before.

They'd take care of him. He didn't have to think about _anything_.

He was making punched out little grunts, moaning into the wet heat between Jade's powerful legs, one hand gripping the sheets and the other pressed up against Rose's clit. John was fucking him hard and deep, like he liked it, but more importantly how _John_ liked it.

He was like that for who knows how long. His mind left him for greener pastures. All he knew was that he was completely, fully, incredibly happy, pressed between the people he loved most in the world, out of his mind with energy and heat.

When he came back to himself again, Jade must have come, because she was off him, though he was wet from her all down his neck and chin. She now had her own head buried between Rose's legs, licking her out with single-minded determination while Rose squeezed Dave's hand and tried to muffle her sounds by biting down on the meat of her other palm. He was sweating and panting and drooling, and John was rocking into him with his eyes fixed on his face, kneeling on the bed now with Dave's hips all tilted up to meet him. He was pulling him down onto his cock as he moved, and just the thought of it made Dave's stomach go tight-- being manipulated to make it good, not even thrusting back himself. John locked eyes with him and grinned lazily, like he could do this forever, like they had all the time in the world. Dave knew it couldn't be true, not with however long it had been, he _had_ to be reaching his limit, but the concept of being stuck here as long as they wanted, unable to do anything but take what they wanted to give him, too fucked out of his mind to speak beyond incoherent moaning, drooling all over himself-- Well, it was working for him.

"You gonna come for me, Dave?" John asked, and Dave felt the breath get knocked out of him. Next to him, Rose made a high pitched noise, fucking back against Jade's questing fingers.

"Like this?" Dave managed to ask, after a few false starts. It took so much to string the words together. Despite that, his hips kept working, breaking out of the rhythm John was guiding him in. He was grinding against the air, his cock dripping pre-come steadily onto his stomach and thighs. "You're not, ah, you're not gonna--" He broke off to moan, but John shook his head, good humored. He must have been getting close; he couldn't keep up the even pace, was now going faster and less measured.

"Like this," John affirmed. "Just like this. You've done it before. You'll do it now. You're going to do it now. You're going to come for us, Dave, for all of us, just from my dick in you and the knowledge that you've been so, so good and done everything we asked tonight, used your body like it's meant to be used. Come on. Come on, you can do it." Dave whined loudly, his hips twitching and shifting, his hand tightening around Rose's as she turned to kiss him, unfocused and messy.

"Come on," Rose whispered, breathy against his lips. Jade's unoccupied hand came up to clutch at his leg, though her mouth was still busy between Rose's legs.

He wasn't sure he could. He wasn't sure he could up until the point that there was another press up against his prostate, and hands tight on his thighs and hips, until the point when all at once, his stomach went too-tight and the pressure built. With all their hands on him, Dave's hips jerked beyond his control, and his eyes shut tight and his mouth got bitten worse than before as he pushed up and came all over himself.

 

He'd lost himself for longer this time, he knew, because when he was aware again, there was a wet washcloth being wiped between his legs (by John, probably, who cleaned up after himself) and Jade was pressing a cool water bottle into his hand, one of her environmentally friendly reusables. The main light was out, and a small lamp on his bedside lit. He hadn't been asleep, he was sure of that from previous experience; it was more just like... missing. There and awake, but vague and distant, likely to forget any dumb thing he'd said. Rose pulled the wet sheets out from under him and replaced them with a different blanket, while he grumbled about being made to move.

When he didn't open the water bottle right away, Jade pulled the top open, and pressed it to his lips. He gulped it down, finding himself thirsty. Thirsty, but warm, still tingling all across his skin. Full (though not with dick, anymore), full of fuzzy happiness and so much love it threatened to make him cry again, though his cheeks had dried.

"Love you guys," Dave slurred, once the bottle was empty and his eyes were feeling heavy. He wasn't sure if he had gotten the point across, so he said it again. "Love you guys a lot."

"We love you too," Jade said, pressing little kisses to his cheek. John climbed onto the bed to curl around him, pulling Dave into his arms and against his warm bare chest. He kissed him on the nape of his neck. Rose wiggled in on the other side of Jade, her arms around her but reaching to slide one hand over to where John and Dave's were tangled up.

"We do," John said, and Rose made a sleepy affirmative sound, often too tired after sex to say much of anything.

 

There would be life to go back to, soon. Things to do. And they might not make it through the night like this, too warm or sweaty or pushed together to sleep all four of them to one bed, especially blanketless. But for now, this was all there was, and all there needed to be, and Dave was safer here than anywhere else in the world.

 

**Author's Note:**

> And yes, damiana IS a real herb.
> 
> Title from Another Word for Desperate by Straylight Run, because I could NOT think of something original. Another line from that song is "so down on hands and knees/choking, gasping, dripping spit".


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